It's that time of year again. Everyone is talking about resolutions and what they want to do to better themselves for the new year. If you're going through a divorce, think about making some resolutions about that process or how you want to live your life after the divorce is final. Here are some ideas:
1. Foster the relationship between your child(ren) and their other parent. Yes, you and your spouse are getting a divorce, but that doesn't change the fact that you are both parents of the same children. It is important that each parent has a good relationship with the children, and that the children know they can count on each parent for love and support. This doesn't mean that you have to gush about how great the other parent is. It may just be encouraging your child to have fun during the other parent's visitation time, or helping your child pick out a birthday present for the other parent.
2. Work with your spouse to settle the divorce together, rather than have a final trial. If you and your spouse settle your divorce issues through negotiation or mediation, you will likely be happier with the results than if a Judge just tells you what the result will be. Through negotiation and mediation, you have control over the outcome and can often agree to things which the Judge will be unable to do.
3. Don't sweat the small stuff. You may have an ex who is always 15 minutes late for visitation with the children, or who always pays his/her child support one day late. Try to focus on the big picture: You have an ex who is showing up for visitation and paying child support! By letting these small (yet annoying!) issues go, you will let go of stress and, ultimately, lead a happier life.
Happy New Year!